Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
