this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
