Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
