My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
