just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
