Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
