im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Randomize
