it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Randomize
