I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
