i wish my penis had a tongue
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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