even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
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