SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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