My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
