I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Your penis caused this!
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
