he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
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