i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
