Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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