you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
