Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize
