u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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