So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
