He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
