My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
