Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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