id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
