you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
