I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
