Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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