Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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