Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
