Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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