There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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