i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
