hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
