We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
