I just made out with a guy for $7.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
