Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
