I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
My breasts were aching with rage.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Randomize
