great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
