Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
