Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I just googled if crying burns calories
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Floor bacon is actually really good
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
