I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
this will be a night to untag.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
