Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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