Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
