dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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