we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
