You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
