ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
