The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
