11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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